Today's daily lesson comes from Psalm 73 verses 21 through 23:
21 When my soul was embittered,
when I was pricked in heart,
22 I was brutish and ignorant;
I was like a beast toward you.
23 Nevertheless, I am continually with you;
you hold my right hand.
In the darkest part of my life, when my heart had turned bitter as sour wine and my soul turned in on itself in first narcissism and then depression, I found myself one Sunday morning against my will sitting in church. I hated myself and I hated God and I hated myself even more for hating God and for bringing my hatred into a holy place. The unsaintliness of my own spirit felt exposed and threatened in the company of the saints. I couldn't wait to get out -- to run back off into the safety of my own isolation. I had become my own shame.
And then the Postlude began, and the pastor came down from the chancel and stepped into pew I was on and set down beside me; and before I could protest or even think about it, my hand was being held.
I can never fully articulate the importance of that Sunday in my life. The whole grace of God was bound up in that simple gesture of coming down and holding my hand. It was all that was necessary for someone to do to keep me alive.
And it is all I hope to do for someone else today.
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